“If cabin pressure should change, panels above your seat will open revealing oxygen masks. Please secure your own mask before helping others.” It is a script that seasoned jetsetters could recite verbatim in their sleep. But even though these instructions are disseminated to travelers on daily commercial flights world-wide, the notion of putting ourselves before others seems to contradict our most basic maternal instincts.
Contrary to the aviation regulations, motherhood is an all-consuming role consisting of, but not limited to, endless diaper changes, everlasting snotty noses and a myriad of sacrifices. We sacrifice a good night’s sleep, our ability to fit into size 2 skinny jeans, and a substantial part of our bank accounts all in the name of doing what is best for our children. By putting their needs above our own, we are offering our children more opportunities for growth and enrichment, and perhaps even shaping the minds and hearts of future world leaders.
It’s far too often that we obsess about the minutiae of parenting only to realize that an entire day went by without a single moment of solitude. Maybe your baby refuses to wear his mittens in cold weather, or maybe he ingested some dirt from your neighborhood sandbox. Perhaps your toddler even used the walls of your home to create crayon-based mural drawings. In the grand scheme of things these are only minor grievances, but they distract us from some of the most fundamental basics of healthy living – assuring that our own needs are met and exercising self-compassion. It’s imperative that despite our perpetually demanding role as mothers, we refrain from becoming so narrowly focused on the upbringing of our children that we neglect to take time for ourselves.
Spending time engaging in self-care rituals can sometimes feel selfish and overly-indulgent when there are little ones vying for your attention. You may ask yourself how you can possibly justify a spa day when the kids so desperately need you, but that’s where you’re wrong. Only after we are able to replenish our own spirits do we have the capacity to be fully present and address the needs of our children with authenticity. Denying ourselves of the opportunity to practice self-care habits is like treading water in a rip current and will almost always result in parental burnout.
Self-care is a broad term that encompasses anything we do to maintain our emotional and physical well-being. Practicing meditation, taking a bubble bath, indulging in our favorite meal, or spa treatments are popular self-care activities among some of my closest friends. But so many of us (myself included) often need a reminder to get off the hamster wheel of our chaotic lives and actually do something to pamper ourselves and recharge our batteries.
As a self-professed shopaholic, nothing soothes my soul quite like a quick jaunt around Bloomingdales or any of my other favorite mega retailers. After all, when the going gets tough, the tough go shopping! Mindlessly meandering through racks of my most beloved designers is my most preferred way to purge my mind of the chaos of everyday life. Escapism at its best, retail therapy doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg. Although “comfort buys” certainly put a spring in my step, it’s not always necessary to purchase anything to achieve a similar degree of inner-peace. Window shopping, or what I like to refer to as “research,” is a mood-boosting multi-sensory experience. Running delicate fabrics between my fingers or taking in the fragrance of buttery-soft leather transports me to a place of pure relaxation.
What are some of the things you do to self-soothe?
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